Hi all in bloggerland.
This ride that began with the hope of an adoption has been a life changing experience. I have learned to love a country so far from my own, and in spite of the negative representation its culture (read: my in-laws) has had in my personal life. I am so happy that I followed my heart and it led me to Viet Nam. I am grateful that I have connected to 1/2 of my son's heritage and I know that someday we will visit, I hope someday we will also welcome a sibling from VN as well. Unfortunately it will not be the way I'd hoped.
My entire world crumbled yesterday. Our marriage had cracks, what marriage doesn't, but it just shattered. All it took was 3 words. I am at this moment in shock. I thought K~ had been having emotional issues, family issues, or a mid-life crisis. I've been trying to be supportive, helpful, accommodating. I never brought up the adoption because I didn't want him to concentrate on that, when he needed to concentrate on his own issues. A~ and I went without sooo much. I thought the only thing I needed from him was some support in return. Little did I know.
If I had a time machine...
Now things are falling into place, all of the questions being answered. Well if I ever wanted "that one thing" to end it he gave it to me on a silver platter. I've been on the phone to clinics and lawyers all night and all morning.
Hopefully this is a karmic cleansing. Like being re-born.
This is the last post to this blog.
My best wishes and thanks to you all that have stopped by and those who have given input. At somepoint in the future I will probably blog again, about life - new life, and I'll post a link.
Thanks and Smooth speedy adoptions to you all!
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6 comments:
I am so sorry..for you and your son... I hope you do blog again and I wish you happiness on the other side. I have followed your blog but haven't commented much...hope to read you again soon.
{{{HUGS}}}
I'm so so so sorry. I hope you blog again. Take care.
Holy smokes, I can't believe how many times you've been kicked in the gut one way or another these past few months. I am so sorry that things shattered like this, on top of everything else you've been trying to work through. To echo the other comments, I do hope you come back to blogging again when you are ready and able. Take care.
I'm so very sorry. Take care of yourself and your son.
I'm so so sorry. I also hope you blog again - maybe a different place, a different topic, but still poignant and reflective. Hang tough. Your attitude is amazing. Also I think we share in-laws! I'm sorry for that too :-(
Wow, I first discover your blog -- and it's many, MANY helpful comments about your adoption -- only to discover your heartbreak. I am very sorry. Two weeks ago, actually, my relationship ended suddenly, just as I began my homestudy. It is bewildering and scary, but it is nothing like a marriage. Good luck soldiering through.
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