So it's Friday.

I'm still learning...
I've been glued to the computer, reading blogs and web groups, anything I can find. I even emailed the consulate in Hanoi. All in my quest for information. I know I don't HAVE to be this anal, but since I wasn't at all when we signed with our agency I am making up for that now. They came so highly recommended, I thought I had done due diligence by checking out other families. Now I know, in this case those families could have been talking about another place entirely, as there was no way they could recommend a new program. But I didn't realize the difference between program and agency. Silly me, I believed the schpiel about it's all about the children, and we're non profit, we just want the families to be happy. I mean I didn't fall for it 100 percent, and I'm sure they are about the kids and families up to a point, but all I had to do was look around at the office and see there clearly was profit being made. I fell enough to believe that they were going to have my back so to speak, I now don't feel they truly do. And this is not just my agency, it's any agency, I feel. They are in the business of adopting, not of taking care of customers. The general feeling I get from agencies in general is that the end result is what matters, not the in between. I really thought they'd have standards regarding customer service! As we're spending our entire life savings on adoption, I figured agencies would at least owe us that. But I suppose most APs don't go back to the agency that delivered them their child and say 'you did a bad job'. It does seem trival when we're talking about children and I think that's what gets them off the hook, we're too worried about being polite or seeming ungrateful. I think more APs should let agencies know when they're less than satisfied. Otherwise what incentive do they have to improve? I swear it's easier to find a good waxer or a good car mechanic than a good agency, and you know why I think that is? Because there's little regulation, and there is rarely such a thing as free speech in the adoption world.(I wish there was an Angie's list for adoption) Here I thought 'no news was good news', when in truth it's often the opposite. I have to say that I can get pretty livid about the whole thing, especially when I hear about celebrities adopting and they spew all this wonderful well-meaning stuff about for the kids and helping kids, great, that is truly awesome, it is. But those kids who will be adopted, they need parents that aren't run through the ringer. Those kids need someone to advocate for their parents too! Not that I'm saying this isn't worth it, I know it will be. I just don't think that it has to be this secretive, unorganized, and difficult. Not to mention I have yet to figure out why exactly it is so insanely expensive (for "non- Profit").
See I said I get on a soap box again. ; )

I'm still not sure if we are for sure going to change agencies. I am about 80 percent there. It would make things 'easier', and 'cheaper' to stay, but I'm up for difficult and more $. If we do stay, I plan to become everything I am not now, I am going to ask questions and want real answers, I'm going to be calling, emailing, everything to let them know I'm not just in it for the ride. I am going to be OUR biggest advocate and I'm not going to care if I 'bug' them or not, which I'm sure at some point I will. (things I'd do now anywhere we adopted from)

Well, the four year old calls.....